I sometimes feel more nutty than before, on this road of travels many sights, many people, and the lessons I’ve learned can not be shared, in words, so music helps to express the progress. Traveling, wandering, rooting, growing, we are all experiencing lost and found, ups and downs, but I tend to experience these things daily . A message I wrote to a friend, included a few inspirational songs, then the day continued, and the mix tape continued to play. Oh messages through sound. …….I wish you the safest travels, you always have a place to be. Love to you during this transition.
Here are a few things that came to me this morning… this is a little game, i played with a dearly beloved during a travel….
pendant ma vacance, j’apport dans ma valise: _________ [translation] during my vacation, I take with me in my suitcase___________
(now you get to fill in the blank)
moi? j’apport avec moi, ——une etoile fuillet (says the 7 year old mini)——a shooting star
oh thank you inspirations from the stars
As we travel together, we are not far from each other in distance although lightyears it seems. May we shine brightly alone as the sun, though together shine in the night’s sky making constellations, visual shapes to entertain our night’s mind. We are all shining stars, rock stars, falling stars… shining on for a period of time. I have learned the beauty of presence in the past wanders of future thoughts, now coming together for clarification. It is a continual lesson, daily.
Meditating on death today, how many of us know the depth of this Buddhist concept through the loss of a loved one in our life. Sometimes it is a death of our self, a former self, perhaps a illness or sickness surrounds and envelopes our minds and bodies, let that go, the past is killing us, so through expression, it can be released.
Sometimes we have only but a short time with our loved ones, may we feel compelled to share the words, I Love You, through our actions, in the light of our eyes and the smile on our face of gentle embrace.
Lost and Found, Some Sherm songs mix tape:
avett brothers [head full of doubt road full of promise]
mumford sons [little lion man]
format [give it up]
florence and the machine [dog days are over]
avett brothers [when i drink]
xavier rudd [messages]
so hold nice and close, won’t you? and get to your soul, so that when it is cold, you won’t feel so alone, cause the roads that you take may crack and break, with the changes you will confront…..with each gift that you share, you may heal and repair, with each choice you make you may help someone’s day, I know you are strong, may your journey be long and now I wish you the best of lucki’m trying not to go completely out of my mind here. manic morning mix tape, missing seattle while being sad in phoenix feelings, missing being in my hOMe in the bungalow northwet, struggling to maintain everwhere that I am need to remember to let go….and be HOME with my roots and family. home is where I lay my head, with spirits running through my head.
[Freestylers] ….leave the past behind, just walk away, when it’s over, and the heart breaks,
and the cracks begin to show….
this song reminds me of a winter night in phx finding my path through the darkness from the cloudy north wet hibernation
[The Kinfe] Deep Cuts …one night to be confused, one night to speed up truth we had a promise made, four hands and then away both under influence, we had divine scent to know what to say, mind is a razor blade to call four hands of above, to lean on wouldn’t be good enough for me one night of magic rush, the start a simple touch one night to push and scream, and then relief we were in love ten days of perfect tunes, the colors red and blue we had a promise made, we were in love and you, you knew the hand of a devil, and you kept us awake with wolves teeth sharing different heartbeats in one night to call for hands of above to lean on, wouldn’t be good enough for me to lean on
[bjork] – all is full of love white rabbit?
[telepopmusik] love can damage your health…..you’re too nice to him, and you’re too nice to her.. baby keep up your shield, cause she doesn’t hear just what they say (beautiful jazz mix) i’ve brought you something to see, left in something you are my dream, there’s nothing to do just believe, just breathe, (words,stopped breathing)
[Radiohead] there there…. just cause you feel it, doesn’t mean it’s there…..
[Submarines] 1940 …… (love this one ) so rise, and shine, now’s the time to stay awake with me tonight.
[Bjork] New World……if living, is seeing….. who do we have here?
[Beatles] All across the universe
[Telepopmusik] smile…….haven’t seen that smile, in such a long while, don’t do this to me again….where are the keys, keys to the door? still i can’t forget
[Sneaker Pimps] 6 underground….dont think cause i understand, don’t think, cause i’m talking, i’m open to fall from grace
[radiohead] You never washup after yourself
[Bitter:Sweet] Don’t forget to Breathe…….and when you take my hand, you’ll know exactly where i am, we never said our goodbyes
[Incubus] aquious submissous (one of my fave all time meditation songe) I’m floating down the river……further down the river, will I make it back to shore or drift into the unknown
[Telepopmusik] Just Breathe…..another day, staring at the ceiling…..
This was stumbled upon as a memory refresher post a day of white rabbit music mix sherm songs of romantic love and lost.
Lately, I’ve been in a vortex in Phoenix, too inspired to share, perhaps at a time of self reflection, what ever it may be, my production of thoughts to blog have not been prolific. So again, I will share my feelings via song, and a little dance.
In India, on my birthday, I dressed in a traditional sari, and handed gulab jamon to each hand of the little ones I was so fortunate to share a brief moment in time with. Now, 4 years later, I am continuing the tradition by sharing gulab jamon with you…. oh well, actually, we are a sophicated bunch of artists no? we keep the sticky fingers to Williem et al For that kind of lovin, you may need to head to Bar Smith for some Sticky Fingers ;) I’m appreciating the arts around our community this weekend instead of sharing sticky gooey sugary mess with you.
As a shout out to the continual forces behind the thriving arts community of Phoenix, I’m heading to these local events to applaud and appreciate all you do to keep our family creative and productive.
It was a full moon, fitting that it would arrive on my birthday weekend. Witch much? That’s what my friends always thought, until now I think the world is catching on that we are guided by the sun moon and stars, duh.. Last night I spent my night among friends and family new and old. Thanks to Nicole et al for this beautiful gathering to Raise the Vibration
singing this song:
I am an old woman, I am a young woman
I am a healer and my soul will never die
We are a old family, we are a new family
We are the same family, stronger than before
I am an old man, I am a young man
I am a warrior and my soul will never die
After the moon rises tonight, I’ll bob around to see the sights, and go ooooo and ahhh at all I experience around me on this ever continual wanderland of life. For my friends in the Northern lands,I wish I could be in two places at once, – so support this event Ryan Henry Ward et al ar producing Who’s Hoo. I’m curious as well who is who of our arts community, lets check it out and see!
I’m so happy our friends bring the gatherings of good people in public places. City Scape sounds great on a Friday with Sean Watson in Phoenix Vig yummy thanks Jonny!
Quincy et al will be showcasing the upstairs of a rare viewing of the Icehouse for FFAFF. Thanks for keeping this space thriving Phoenix community, we appreciate the years of creative expressionism contained between the brick walls, and limitless like the open sky rooftop.
I’m all about supporting the local boys going to SXSW this coming week. Congrats! Insects et al! Tempe Tavern
At midnight, this girl will have survived my first year of my 30’s, and the past 31 years to my existence, saying “we did it” makes a lot more sense when we are near our next phase in life. Thank you all for being a part of the journey to the moon and back again. A tipping point if you say. This has been quite a ride for one year of travels in my book!
Continuing as the paths unfolds, I look forward to another year to come- sounds so scripted, of course I have more to say where this came from but timing is everything! As another year of working towards the dream, and oftentimes, living the dream in my own head, I am committing myself to producing my dreams within this year.
For those of you out there who want to support me in these endeavors, my only birthday gift I hope you will share with me is to send back positive encouragement and mindful support for the ever developing and growing project I’ve been calling BanyanTri. Believe it or not, when you strive to accomplish something great and put all your efforts into that, there is a surrender and some hopeful joy for the hard work and determination shared. I only want to bring positive thoughts to this beginning phase, thank you for being a part of this with me. From Seed, to root to fruition I hope that this project impacts our communities everywhere in the very near future.
I appreciate all the love and support I have received throughout the years of my growth as the woman that I hope to be very soon, and happy for where I have been at present. The best way to keep up with me during this time and continue to support is through maintaining involvement in the process and continuing to communicate with me! It keeps getting somewhere down the path to the next phase, I’m hoping that this is the year that things explode!
Thanks to the gnomes and elves stealing, breaking or having fun with my technology, sometimes I go in and out of technical breakdowns, malfunctions and oftentimes smoke signals are the only way for keeping in reach, I’m just old fashioned I guess. Please help me to KIT with you as well! At present please contact me via voice mail 801.960.2742 soon I’ll have a working phone back in service. Email is always best to set up a time to meet face to face, and when I perhaps see you out and about an event, I still feel like I’m in India so if you catch me in a daze, oftentimes it’s because I forgot where I was Post amnesia I guess, Yes, I am getting old!
I hope we are all appreciating the days as they move from sunrise to sunset and the moon rise to moon set. May we continue our wanders with health, love and peace. Blessings for the transition from winter to spring!
This Saturday will be up in the air as imagined by my standards, so I hope to see my loved ones throughout the weekend and if not I’ll make March my birthday month! Let me know of anything friends
If anyone is up for Sunday Funday Family Bike-BBQ-Hike: I should be with the fam in the evening at some local spot, let me know if you want to meet up! Thinking Papago
I could think of no other but a classic for Valentines… Chet Baker, My Funny Valentine
A special day for my little sis, 15 years younger, turning 15 today. She brought the luv into our family’s house, and a bit of zany goodness too! Love you little sis! This one’s for you! Happy Birthday baby doll!
Imparting my knowledge on my little sis is what big sista’s are supposed to do, no? I’ll stay to my oath: to embarrass you as much as humanly possibly, just to remind you that you’re loved. Time old question, Why do the boys always tease you when they like you? sorry, sis, I just don’t have the answer! So when your heart aches for the first time, or 5th, there will always be a sad song to go through the gloom. ;)
Music has the ability to move through the emotion and express something from deep within. These are some of my favorite love songs, those that helped mend a broken heart from time to time, and those that remind me of the innocent love I once knew. Here’s to you little sis for year to come, boys, I’ll be beating you off with sticks from here on out
Ella Fitzgerald Good Morning Heartache
Nina Simone, Love me or leave me
When I was 15 – these women were the first influences: Bjork, Tori Amos, PJ Harvey, mix by Massive Attack
Sade Somebody already broke my heart
Tori Amos Winter I’ve played this one on the piano for the past 15 years of my piano meditations
Ani D Joyful Girl
Edith Piaf – Ne me quitte pas
Sade By your side
Till the day he left us he shared an unconditional love, this one was shared between Sherm and I.
I almost didn’t go, that feeling of anxiety before going outside, taking it easy at home (away from home), lots of projects. As my family was playing in big kid playground back in Tempe Phoenix New Times music event, or just playing xbox in the burbs back home, our home town heros native Format came on the Pandora station like words to my ears – “so give it up throw your hands in the air cause change is just a way to say we’ll get out of here, something tells me that you’re too scared, too scared to go….”
I thought to myself, I ain’t scar’d! So I took up my boots that are made for walking, (and got a ride with Rachelley to the theatrejust blocks from my Bungalow). I know, I know, I’ve wandered through Mumbai on rickshaws and trains at midnight when women were not supposed to walk outside their house alone. I’ve learned my lesson about safety from being in Seattle, pounding the pavement in the rainy cold winter nights from late night transit buses and trains in the dirty south as I lovingly refer to my neighborhood is sometimes more than the average traveler can handle, and exactly the issue my previous wanderings this day brought me to understand.
I was able to attend the Major McGuinn’s city meeting about our little Columbia City of Seattle. How I wandered to this meeting was out of white rabbit coincidence! A friend had sent an email about the current arts initiatives which our grateful City of Seattle offers to support the development and sustainance of the arts and cultural programs in Seattle. there was out of curiosity for the current city programs that I am interested in seeing how the BanyanTri concept will be able to interplay in our city.
So as the wanderings continued, I was grateful for the guidance of by loved ones to bring me to a different space in time. I went to the Columbia City Theatre to stand in awe of the melodic sounds and intense emotion of Kelli Schaefer et al. Thank you for bringing tears of joy to my eyes, and a peace to my homesick heart.
Better Idea Take my hand in the front yard. Take my hand in the back row, when I’m tired, hold me close, don’t let me go. Cause I want to be louder, and to stand up tall, but I am loading all my cannons with cottonballs, and it’s not workin. Well i can’t treat my body, like a temple, when it is failing, are you kidding? Was that your plan to keep me grounded. And the seed that you have planted is needing things that I can’t give it. How low can it get, when you’re waiting? But I’m scared because I can’t stop trying
City Morge You gotta stop me when I start back up again. I could make you proud, make you clap your hands instead. Cause I will let you down. Hold your temper, under water. And hand your canvas to your brother. I know what it’s like to bury your heart in a dying idea.
Gone in Love I will wipe the tears of my brothers’ tears with a sleve of my jacket. …And the weight won’t be waiting, will never be overbearing, when the burden is love, is the only weight that ever was worth carrying. And I will hold my sister even though my arms are shaking. and will demand that she be given back, what has been taken. ’cause When you’re gone in love, there is no risk, no prize, just a table, maybe a warm heart, maybe a trusting pair of eyes. And I will sing my mother hymns. For every heart ache, oh my mother, i am sorry. But when you say you broke my heart, I fell in love with your trying, and I want you to know, that there is nothing that you have done that has been waisted. Cause when you’re gone in love… There is no risk, there is no prize. Just a table.
I remember singing to Whitney on the radio, when my momma was driving me to voice lessons, even back in the day I wanted to be a Diva like Whitney. I wanna dance with somebody who loves me, whooooh yeah!
Even as a child I knew the power of teaching truths and wisdom to children.
And if you find that special place, that you’ve been dreaming of, leads you to a lonely place, find your strength in love.
When someone close to our hearts is no longer in our lives, it feels like there is a loss that can never be filled. Food doesn’t taste sweet on our tongues any longer, getting out of bed is on the “To-Do list” and staying in bed seems like the only activity worth doing, the sun doesn’t even need to shine because we aren’t going outside. In the depths of loss is seems like an alone place, though even in times of solitude, we are surrounded by angels that lift us up and carry us forward. Understanding loss and death through our experiences in this life teaches us how to love more deeply than before.
You’re love is my love and my love is your love, it would take an eternity to break us. Even in death our loved ones are with us. It is okay to cry thinking of our loved ones gone. We are human, having human experiences, those who have gone ahead before we have are continuing alongside this continual journey and wanderland.
Rest in peace all my loved ones of the past, may your spirit continue to guide me forward to carry out the light and love from your influences. I’ll think of you every step of the way. I will always love you.
. A message I wrote to a friend, included a few inspirational songs, then the day continued, and the mix tape continued to play. Oh messages through sound. …….I wish you the safest travels, you always have a place to be. Love to you during this transition. 
